For once. I’m not even talking about sex. Well… not directly at least. Yes, yes I am aware my latest posts have been… popular culture orientated… but that is mostly due to the fact that I haven’t got much time to research or travel lately… So unless you want a rehashing of what’s happening on the news, relationship advice is what you are all getting!
Satisfaction… what is it? Well… let me look on my trendy and useful dictionary !
In other words… satisfaction comes down to “fulfilment”… if only it was that easy! Because, satisfaction is a more complicated concept. In order to be deemed “satisfied” one has to know what they want… and for many of us, that is the problem. Of course if I walk past a bakery and I see a chocolate cake it’s easy to say “mmm that looks delicious, I’m going to buy it and eat it”. Thus, satisfaction here is obtained not only by the purchase of the cake, but also its consumption. But, is it possible to have what we want… and still be unsatisfied?
To quench ones thirst, one must drink. But does that mean that after we have drank that we are left not wanting more? The problem really is if we are satiated… or even worse. I have my cake… I have eaten it (or drank my glass of water) but if I see something I want more/better… am I still quenched or will I always need more?
This is desire.
Satisfaction and desire is thus intertwined… as well as the sensation of fulfilment.
What I have noticed lately is how the human race toys with each other forever wanting and abandoning what they no longer desire. It is no longer about having ones cake and eating it so to speak, but it is far worse. We are no longer “happy” with what we can have, or what we see. We forever want what we cannot have, or even unhappy once we have what we previously wanted. Love, sex, relationship, men, women… everything is now at risk of this.
In other words, girl meets guy. Both girl and guy like each other, but in order to not seem too keen (for example) both play a game of cat and mouse. Guy chases girl. She pretends to be uninterested. Guy stop chasing girl. Girl is disappointed that the guy has stopped playing. She starts chasing Guy. Guy stops reacting… When does the game stop? Seriously. This situation is absolutely ridiculous. BUT WE ALL DO IT! Everyone has the same “social makeup”. We all want what we can’t have, and as soon as we get it… we no longer want it. This particular example, I’m living it RIGHT NOW! It’s annoying. Boy starts to act very “aloof”… and Roxy starts to wonder if guy doesn’t liker her any more… and spends the day waiting and watching to see him online in the hpe that guy will talk to her.
And so continues the game… until one of the participants thinks “Argh this is no longer worth my time”. And promptly gives up. The sad thing is this situation, is that there could be more than one reason for the game. Here are the solutions (in case you didn’t already know)! :
1) He is STILL playing the “I’m-going-to-pretend-I-don’t-really-like-you-to-keep-you-keen” game,
2) He has gotten bored and is no longer interested,
3) He was just playing in the beginning to see the reaction of the girl,
4) Or… out of pure sport
In other words… either he likes you… or he doesn’t. But the problem here is not just the premise of the game but the fact that we all crave the drama. Men, women everyone loves it. We lap it up all the time. Why do you think stupid soap operas are popular? Everyone knows the stories are insane and pushed to the limit of the possible and the probable… but we all love it. We love it because we like the chase. We all want to feel desired. We all want to feel the satisfaction of winning. We love the romance, and more importantly… without the chase, love and lust would be boring. Even I will admit that it isn’t sexy if a guy comes up to you and tell you he wants to “go out with you/make out/have sex” etc. Every girl will prefer waiting at the bar and being bought drinks while a man flirts. She is most of the time uninterested… but hey, who says no to free drinks? Not many. Since the dawn of time there has been “courtship”… and yeah sure, we no longer are princesses waiting to be married off to some prince… but we still want the guy to run after us (and vice-versa).
That said, there is a problem we should elucidate… we may all like the drama… but we should all learn that there’s no point to games. Stop before the games get boring. For me… this guy may be busy, but I’m too old (ok I’m 22… but I’ve been at this quite a while now!) to be strung along for no reason… so I have sent my last email… now the balls’ in his court. We may all have the idea that we have to fight for love, and I am the first to admit that if I like someone, I want them to know. But no one wants to go on a fools errand. We all get to that point where we become Ponce Pilate. You know who I’m talking about. The guy who washed his hands when asked to make a judgement on what should be done about Jesus. Well, everyone has a limit, and when you get to that limit… everyone washes their hands.
Even though my hands are still dirty, I’m going to wait a little longer. But, will I be satisfied if I get what I want? Who knows. All we can do is try!
Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger...