Monthly Archives: September 2014

“Is it time to stop questioning?”

Is there a point you eventually get to, (and I suppose this is true with any subject), when you decide that you should stop questioning every move you make and just live? We always analyse every situation, try and understand where we went wrong, dissect every moment, word, phrase, body language… anything to get a grip on some sort of “reality”, to in face fall face forward into fiction.

I realise that sometimes I think too much, try and understand and make sense of a situation that is unfathomable. You can’t get into people heads and truly know what they think, why they decide one thing and not another… people say you should live the moment, not to over think anything. I am not sure that is really any better than over thinking anything either. You can be over prepared, but walking blindly in is no way better… but is there really a middle ground? One where you sit in a situation live it as well as taking things as they come without questioning too much?

It’s impossible. It’s basically justifying stupidity. That said, there is no way of trying to put someone in a box or a category i order to understand the decisions they make. Of course, like with anything organic, there are patterns… that does not mean there are not anomalies. But, as I am an over-thinker, over-analyser, I will agree that taking a step back and not asking “why” too much, can only be beneficial. Carpe diem my life I suppose.

Anyway, I am just meditating on the subject… shall probably pick this issue up again.


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He’s been born!

I think I was to name him eggy bastard. Dunno why.


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Ohhhh you can see it’s head!

Not sure of the “breed” of dinosaur here but at least he’s alive!


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Walla walla walla

Arghhhhhhjj isn’t insomnia a bitch? Thank god for wine and watching my dinosaurs hatch!

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It’s hatching!


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09/15/2014 · 11:27 pm

People are like apples

You're rotten, aren't you? It’s a bit of a cliché, but life really is like a tree. We all have roots and we all try and grow as strong as we can. There are storms that break our branches, our twigs fall and die, our leaves wither, we can bleed sap and we lose our leaves… some of are those leaves. We are blown this way and that, and we don’t where we end up, but we always land somewhere. As some people are the leaves, some of us are the branches, some are the trunks and some just never grow to full maturity. We are all the trees, but we are the apples that grow too. Some apples are the weakest link on the chain, because some of us are born not as pretty, not as shiny, and some of us start life seedless, or rotten on the inside. No apple is perfect. Neither are we.

We all aspire to grow and develop, have lives of our own, but some fall off the tree before they are given the chance to grow into their full potential. That’s sad. Some fall and die because of decease, and some fall off in the wind, because they feel as though they can no longer hold on to life. Some of us prefer to rot. They have that seed of possibility that every apple on the branch should have, but choose to let themselves rot, day by day. When these apples eventually fall off the tree, no one wants them. They’re thrown away, left to rot, alone.

Hope is the few seeds left inside the apple. They mean that even if you fuck up a bit, and fall off too early, there is still that possibility that one day you may regenerate, grow into a new tree,a stronger tree… new life.

I hope that we all choose to take that chance, use our opportunity to grow as strong as we can. Those who fall off the tree, those who let themselves rot to death and give up, realise what they are doing before they take that final battering by the wind and let go. Because all they end up as, are apples by the wayside, people look on, but you can’t eat a rotten apple, not only is it ugly on the inside, it’s ugly on the outside. It’s not appealing. And everyone knows you can’t fix a rotten apple. So you kick it aside and walk on. Especially if it’s rotten to the core, from the inside out.

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I’m expecting!

Ok ok no. I’m not pregnant. Thank Christ. But I am going I be a mother… Jurassic park style.

I don’t know what I’ll call him. We shall see when he’s born. Here’s the first photo!


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