Gottmix? Or is it Gott-Mix?

mmm.... or not?

More Swedish strangeness…

Now seriously Swedes… what is with the pick’n’mix sweets everywhere? I can’t say Sweden is particularly renowned for its sweet tooth (or maybe I have been hanging out with the wrong people!?). Anyhow this evening after an enormous meal consisting of a 90g beef patty burger and fries (courteously of the local restaurant next to campus) my friend and I (a certain Caroline) decided to go on a mission for dessert… which you would think is easy, but on a pretty full stomach, everything seems like a bad idea.

Anyway we decided on sweets (and yes yes mother I know and apple would have bene better!) and HOLY COW was that not the best idea we have ever had! Not only were they not that appealing visually (they look… well kinda all dried up), probably not that sanitary coming from a comunal box but by jove did they not taste that great! You would think that will the enormous amount of E-numbers in there they would have been able to crack the “flavour” part! They look colourful and yeah I suppose “tasty” (to an ADHD child like myself) but the taste could probably have made even Eichmann crumble!

The various names also sound appealing. I mean I chose a “ferrari caramel chocolate car” and some “vampire teeth”. How does that not sound great?

While eating them… our faces started to spasm all over the place. One minute it was too sweet, one minute it was too acidic and another minute it was just plain disgusting! Also, I hate getting duped about sweets. I mean to say, chewing-gum is NOT and I repeat this for emphasis, chewing-gum is NOT a sweet. I believe that “gum” and all “gum” orientated sweets are in a totally new sugary section. So, you can understand my confusion when I bought a strawberry shaped sweet and was found chewing for hours! (ok maybe a couple of minutes but still!). I was duped by the “Gottmix” sweet company! And anyway, of all that is holy is this world these sweets were definitely not a “godly mixe like the company would like us all to think (gott = god in german and gott in Swedish means good) BUT STILL! It is neither good nor godly! So screw this!

If I was american I would probably have already tried to sue them! OUTRAGEOUS! And lastly (but not least!) if the Swedes like these damned pick’n’mix sweets so much, then they have bad sweet tastes… I mean do they realise there are better and tastier sweets out there? I’m thinking of doing in sweet intervention for the good people of Sweden! They are really missing out!

Haribo boy! You need to come to the rescue! I implore you!

Sex, Sex, Sex… and Being a Whore?

SEX?

Sex?

After hearing a fair few comments from other people on other people I thought I’d write this post.

No I’m of the female persuasion… so I am not going to lie. I do enjoy a good gossip… and I’m known for loving to hear about. But after that there is the unspoken rule that you do not pass it on. Gossip is like admitting you enjoy eating at McDonalds : you know you shouldn’t like it but you do. But with good gossip comes great responsibilities. In other words, you better to learn to shut the fuck up. No one likes a loud mouth, and no one (and i mean it) likes to be talked about. Now true, I’m a talker. I love to talk… but I generally don’t talk smack about someone unless I am exceedingly angry or don’t give a rats ass what they think of me.

What I mean to say is this. Gossip is ok, it’s fun, it’s a cheap joke. Just hush about it!

Now this is where my point lies. Sex (again). It always comes down to this (well as well as sleeping, eating and excreting that it). People LOVE to talk about it and we have a numerous programmes, magazines, movies, tv channels etc devoted to it. It’s a free exercise and most people enjoy it and without going into the sordid details… people do it. We can thank the sixties for “free love” and various different contraceptives… but also the fact that men and women could more or less have any sexual freedom they wanted! Woo hoo! Goodbye sexual oppression! (Well not totally but that’s another subject!).

Somehow I feel as though we have slightly regressed these past years. Women are being criticized for being “free spirits” and sleeping around. I don’t get it. Well that’s a lie I do get it and it is not the stereotype that men can sleep around and be called a “stud” and women do it and they become a “whore”. It does not come down to that. It comes down to one thing in my opinion.

It’s ok to sleep around. We are more or less hedonists… the difference with a girl/guy who is perceived as a whore (or man slut) is one who can’t keep their mouth shut. I believe that women should stay women, in the sense that yes you should seize your sexual power and sleep with whoever you want. But stay a women, and be coy about it. No one wants to date a whore… and sometimes a virgin can scare away a guy. So what does a girl have to do nowadays? Well… have sex and with whoever you want dammit! But don’t tell everyone. The reason why the “Sex and the City” gals were not seen as whores because they talked about it in a small circle of close knit friends. None of they guys they slept with thought for one moment that they were “dainty little virgins” but they didn’t want to sleep with a woman who had slept with the whole neighborhood.

So I don’t think you (or I) should feel bad about sleeping with someone because you are scared or what people think. I have friends who I trust and they and only they should know about my personnel life. If you wish to share who you are sleeping with and how many… then so be it! But you must brave the consequences! We are free (at least in most European countries) to do nearly what we want (as long as it doesn’t infringe on someone else’s freedom!) but whatever we say, we still care what people think.

Carpe Diem! Seize the day! Do what you want but think of the consequences (but only if you care!)

xxx

The Perfect Three Course Meal (Well at Least ONE of them!)

Here is a perfectly balanced and tasty meal that I though I would share with you all! Enjoy!

–

Fig and orange salad with melting shropshire blue

Starter

Ingredients

• 3 oranges
• 4 fresh figs
• 150 g toasted walnuts
• 150 g red cabbage, shredded finely
• 175 g rocket

For the dressing

• 150 g Shropshire Blue cheese
• 200 ml crème fraîche

Method

1. Slice the top and bottom off each orange and peel down the sides with a sharp knife. Cut between each membrane to remove the orange segments. Put into a bowl with any juices.

2. Wipe and quarter the figs and add to the orange segments with the toasted pecans, shredded red cabbage and rocket leaves. Toss together well and divide between 4 serving plates.

3. For the dressing: crumble the Shropshire Blue into a small heavy-based pan and cook, stirring, over a gentle heat until cheese melts. Whisk in the crème fraîche and heat gently (don’t allow mixture to bubble) until you have a smooth creamy dressing.

4. Drizzle over each plate of salad and season with freshly ground black pepper.

–

Duck breasts with broccoli and peperoncino

Main Course

Ingredients

• 1 head of broccoli
• 4 duck breast
• olive oil
• 1 large clove garlic, roughly chopped
• ½ small fresh red chillies, seeds removed, thickly sliced
• 200 ml white wine
• dash Worcestershire sauce
• black pepper

Method

1. Preheat the oven to 240C/220C fan/gas 9.

2. Prepare the broccoli by peeling the central stalk and dividing the whole into florets – make sure you keep the stalks attached and keep them long.

3. Bring a pan of salted water to the boil, add the broccoli and blanch for a couple of minutes. Drain and set aside to cool.

4. Cut the duck breasts into three, and score the skin with a sharp knife. Season with salt and pepper.

5. Preheat a large frying pan, add ½ tablespoon of oil and sear the duck breasts skin-side down over medium-high heat. When the skin is brown, turn and sear the other side. Reserve the pan juices.

6. Place the duck in a small roasting pan and roast for 7 minutes if you like your duck rare, or 10 minutes for well done. Remove from the oven and set aside to rest in a warm place.

7. Heat 1 tablespoon of oil in another frying pan over a medium heat. Add the garlic and chilli and cook for a minute until the garlic is just coloured. Toss the broccoli florets in the pan and season with salt and pepper. Remove from the heat and keep warm.

8. To make a sauce for the duck, warm the reserved duck juices over medium heat. Add the white wine and simmer until reduced.

9. Add a little olive oil – this will make the sauce separate slightly – then add a dash of Worcestershire sauce and let it warm through gently.

10. Serve the duck with the broccoli and drizzle with the sauce.

–

Blackberry and apple crumble

Dessert

Ingredients

• 4 large cooking apples, peeled, cored and cut into big chunks
• 1 tbsp water
• 3 tbsp sugar
• 225 g fresh or frozen blackberries, or mixed berries

For the crumble:

• 170 g plain flour
• 75 g butter
• 75 g demerara sugar

Method

Preheat the oven to 180C/gas 4.

Put the apple chunks, water and sugar into a saucepan over a lowish heat and cook until the apples are soft and mushy; this should take about 10 minutes. While cooking, stir it every minute or so to prevent sticking. Taste and add more sugar if it needs it.

Transfer the apple pulp into individual bowls or one big pie dish and allow to cool slightly. Stir the berries into the apples.

To make the crumble, rub the butter into the flour until it resembles very coarse breadcrumbs. However, if you rub it too much the crumble will not be crunchy. Combine with the sugar. Sprinkle the crumble mixture over the slightly cooled apple and bake for 15 mins for small crumbles or 30-45 mins for larger crumbles. Serve warm with whipped cream or vanilla ice cream.

Men Suck !

I suppose this is just me ranting on how full of crap men are. Not only are they pointless pieces of crap and many of them subhuman insects at best. But some of them really and truly are. One minute they are all over you, then they are all over someone else… or they pretend they don’t understand female psychology. WHATEVER!

Seriously, I am not like a fair few girls here who are looking to shag as many people as possible (and from as many countries as possible). I am actually a girl NOT looking for that. Seriously, sex is everywhere. Anyone can have it. I don’t get it. I’m not going to judge the people who do that. I always feel that you should do what you want, and you shouldn’t care what people think of you (as long as you don’t hurt other people). But per-lease, men… don’t act as though you don’t understand what is going through a woman’s brain when you act the way you do.

I will give you a true story example. I will obviously changed said names for anonymity.

I wasn’t interested in this guy… until he asks me out (for coffee or something)… which led me to think… what are his motivations? I didn’t get it. I went, we had a blast… then a few days later… at a party… he asks to come round and watch a movie. Now… I’m going to give him the benefit of the doubt, not because I am angry with him (in this case, I don’t care) but because people should learn from their mistakes.

We stayed up until five in the morning, then he gets up and leaves. I was like whatttt?? So being the honest, straight forward no bullshit person I am, I asked him what his deal was… he says some of the same bullshit you hear from a lot of teen movies about letting someone down (except… he wasn’t, but I wasn’t going to be mean and tell him I actually wasn’t interested to start with). Something about I like you, you are cool but bla bla bla not ready… it’s all about me, it’s not about you etc etc.

Ha, I laughed, rolled over and went back to sleep. This is a perfect example of “lost in translation”. Guy A thinks he is just “hanging out” with a girl… but unless you make it clear to her in the beginning, you do NOT ask to watch movies after a party until five in the morning, that screams “booty call” to many a person (am I right or am I right?). BIG MISTAKE HOMIE! ha, well let’s hope he doesn’t make that mistake twice. His problem I believe was… experience. He didn’t understand that girls analyse EVERYTHING. And I really mean, everything.

Example number two : Before I went off to Copenhagen, I used to have a small crush on this guy (in Erasmus here… not going to say who). But like I am, I didn’t see/hear from him in ages, so I forgot about it and concentrated on me. Having fun here! Then I received what I presume to be a drunken text from him asking me why I am not at some party. (I was sleeping due to my early wake up call to go to Denmark). Anyhow, on the way to Copenhagen on the bus, we chat via text. (Not very interesting conversation really). I’m like… whattt???? Why is he contacting me after such a long time? I’m curious… I start to have “hope”.

Well God shat on that faster than you can say “what did you say?”. I see him at a party where he spends three hours grinding against some girl. He does however have enough time to shout in my ear “HOW ARE YOU? HAVING FUN?”. Well not anymore asshole. pffff

However, you may be asking me… what was his mistake? His mistake was texting me when he wasn’t interested. Don’t ask me why I’m not at a party if I’m not there. It leads women to think, “oh wow… he’s somewhere thinking of me… why was he thinking of me?” etc etc.

NOT GOOD.

So ladies and gentlemen… learn from these guys mistakes.

 

Oh and on another note, making out in public = also a big no no for girls. Argh it’s not sexy and no one what’s to see that.

From the Country of Vikings, IKEA, Meatballs and Blondness…

Cafe Opera By Day...

Ok ok ok I know it… I have it’s true neglected to write here for a fair few time… and I regret that… truth is… I find it hard to find inspiration when I have fuck all to do. Really. I mean… I’ve been on holiday for about a month and a bit… and true I have been to few museums, countries and places in that space of time… but… some days i just (depressingly) spend my time in front of my computer watching movies and shit on tv. (fascinating I know).

So… new resolution. Will write everyday like I used to… and try and mix up my “blog writing music” too… there is only so much Rihanna/Kanye West that one can listen to without going mad (but I will say that the songs are mind numbing enough to block out external sounds… which really is a plus!

Mmm so, what’s new from Sweden? Lot’s of things. I also had my first meeting with a “mean Swede” and it went better than anyone could have hoped. I mean, I was in Malmö, lost and being not of Swedish persuasion, not able to read anything apart from “kafé” and “fika” and “muffin” which really isn’t useful. So since I really only had ten minutes to catch my train, I asked someone. I asked… a Swedish middle aged woman and her husband. BIG MISTAKE! OMFG the woman actually flipped out and started tutting and saying reallllllly loud “no no no no no no no no no NO I do NOT know! No no no no no no!” I was personally shocked, (and quite embarrassed). I mean… this is supposed to be a mild mannered woman, not the Hulk! I swear to you, she reminded me of David hasselhoff DRUNK! Not good!

Anyhow, in the end I ran around like a headless chicken for a while and found the place I was supposed to be (with a while two minutes to spare! BIG UP!)

Also, I ate some “typical” Swedish cakes… not tasty… not tasty at all! They were exceedingly dry for starters and the underlying taste of licorice wasn’t a pleasant accompaniment to my tea. I’m actually shuddering at the very thought of it!

This month has also been a very “party” orientated one too. I have been to so many parties, clubs… bars and what not that I truly have lost count! (but my bank account hasn’t that’s for sure!). I went to the over rated “Ice Bar” in Stockholm… fun… true but pfffff it’s not really all made ut of ice. Just the bar, sculptures and stuff. I mean the roof is like plastic or something. The price isn’t exactly cheap for what it is, but the drinks were delicious and well for 185kr it is a fun experience none the less.

And AT LAST hurray I went to “Cafe Opera” and they opened that really beautiful room they have (and it was worth it!). The drinks are as usual too expensive, and the people there a mix of old-chic and young-tarts… but hey. Fun nights!

I also went to the club “Fashing”… ha ha ha ha SUCH a waste of money! The music (gangster rap!) and the crowd present (boring and young) wasn’t that appealing… and for 140kr can go screw themselves. Arghhhhhh! However it was an “amazing club” if you’re into rap music and scantily clad women (and I’m being kind with the “scantily” part… I really wanted to use a more derogatory term…).

I also went to Copenhagen… we only spent three days there, but that was really enough to visit the city… I mean, I believe Stockholm is far better. It is far more fun here. More things to do. That said, there is this place in Copenhagen where drugs are legal… not much to say on that apart from it be it being really creepy and weird. arghhhhh

As usual, this time was spent meeting new, and really nice new people… which leads me to me next post…

Why We No Longer Need Men…

Men & Women

Now male readers, don’t get all up in arms at me and take the first flight to Sweden and eat my insides. My point is valid… but it doesn’t mean I don’t want me (you have your uses I’ll admit!).

To be honest my source of inspiration isn’t that of our great British bards (sorry Shakespeare) but of televisual amazing-ness… Sex and the City. Ok ok ok… it’s not that great… or even a bit great (Alexander would be angry at my over use of adjectives!) but it IS nevertheless the inspiration of this blog.

Now obviously the four girls talk about many many key subjects… such as the political situation in Kosovo… annnd the what the Dow Jones is worth… NAH!!!!! They talk about sex, men, drinking cosmopolitans… and sex and more sex and sex and sex annnnnd sex (I’m going off on a tangent sorry!). Well, men. While watching an episode (I can’t remember which one, but it isn’t important) I realised that men really aren’t needed anymore.

We don’t need to get married to one to be recognized in society, we don’t need to marry a guy in order for him to work and support us, we don’t need a man to accompany us in the street OR to meet other men… we don’t need them to have children… or raise them! We don’t need men to do heavy lifting (the female versions of Arnold Schwarzenegger are a sad reality), we don’t need them even for sex to be honest (the “Rabbit” can atone to that AMEN!) and well… I can’t think why we really need men to be honest! AND YET they are still paid more than women (up to 30% less – http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/11/06/AR2008110602982.html). WHY,

I’m for equality. I don’t believe that I should have to write a blog post about it. It is a given, women = the same as men (just with less dangly bits!).

So, no we don’t need men… but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t! I love me some man hugs! Man kisses! And well… I like men (as long as the wash)!

But… why else do we not need men?

Hey-ku… No I Mean Haiku!

Ok well today I was thinking of poetry and decided I would write a Haiku. 🙂

I know I am French,
But I don’t eat escargot,
So who am I now?

 

Yes I know applaud applaud!!! Ha ha ha, more of my literary brilliance to come!

Ronald McDonalds Mission : World Domination! First Port of Call? Sweden Baby!

 

I’m Lovin’ It!

I really don’t understand this about Sweden… no really. What’s with all the McDonald’s everywhere? No seriously, I mean I am aware of Ronald McDonald’s desire for world domination… or should I say Culinary Domination… but I think that in Sweden it’s just gotten way out of hand!

If I remember correctly, from the airport (Arlanda) to Central Station (approx : 42km) I counted five! SERIOUSLY! That’s insane! Just on the motorway, in town… I think I’ve seen around five or six! And fine, Swedish people like McDonald’s, but… the Swedes are all (or at least the majority) are thin… or skinny! Wow! So unless it’s for the salads  (and I seriously doubt it is) then who the hell is eating there?

I mean, I HAVE see some fatties, I’m not denying it… and I may have made a trip (or two) to McDonalds after a drunken night… but I didn’t go there because the food tastes good! If you google McDonald’s to see how many there are in Stockholm alone… you get the beautiful number of… well let’s calculate… we have nine pages with addresses that go from A to J… and J being the tenth letter of the alphabet… which means there are 9 x 10 = 90 Mcdonalds in and around stockholm (and I’m not counting those in Uppsala!)

That’s INSANE!

So what shall I do? What is the point of this message? Well firstly, DON’T eat at McDonalds (unless you really have to, and if you need help with getting reasons… I have about a ton, all justifiable!) but in Sweden… because, do they REALLY need any more?

Yeah, I didn’t think so either…

Apple Strudel : I’m So Austrian It Hurts!

This is just plain delicious. Easy peasy lemon squeezy!

Apple Strudel Goodness!

Ingredients 

 

Struuuuuuuuuuuudel!!!

 

 

For the dough

• 250 g plain flour, plus more for dusting
• 30 ml vegetable oil
• pinches salt
• 150 ml water
• 50 ml oil, to brush the dough

For the filling

• 1 kg sour apples, (Granny Smiths are ideal), peeled, cored and chopped
• pinches cinnamon
• 50 g raisins
• 100 g sugar
• 1 lemon, juice only
• 50 ml rum
• 40 g butter, plus extra melted butter to glaze
• 100 g breadcrumbs

To serve

• icing sugar, for dusting
• whipped cream, crème angalise or vanilla ice cream

 

Method

1. For the dough: knead together the flour, oil, salt and water to make a dough and shape into a ball. Put on a lightly oiled plate and brush with the remaining oil. Set aside to rest for an hour.

2. Put the dough on a floured table cloth and roll it with a rolling pin as thin as you can. Flour your hands and bend the dough from the middle to the outside until it is so thin you can read a newspaper through it.

3. For the filling: mix the apples with the cinnamon, raisins, sugar, lemon juice and rum.

4. Melt the butter and stir in the breadcrumbs. Sprinkle this mixture over the dough and top with the apple filling.

5. Use the tablecloth to roll the strudel and pinch the ends together to seal.

6. Preheat the oven to 180C/gas 4.

7. Transfer the strudel carefully onto a baking tray lined with baking paper. Bake for 40 minutes. During baking, brush the top of the strudel several times with melted butter.

8. Before serving, sprinkle the top of the strudel with icing sugar and cut into slices. I recommend serving with whipped cream, vanilla ice cream or sauce anglais.

 

 

Two of the Best Salads this side of Paradise!

We all try and eat healthy… and salads are now found everywhere, from health food shops to burger joints (yes McDonalds I’m looking at you!) but it’s had to know what salads actually taste nice! I hate seeing on the designer salads and thinking “argh crap, I don’t even recognize some of these leaves!” Well, here are some truly delicious salads. Pleasing to the eyes and to your stomach (and your taste-buds!).

–

Warm Bacon, Potato and Chicken Salad 

Chicken...

Ingredients

• 350g new potatoes, cut into quarters
• 5tbsp olive oil
• 1tbsp balsamic vinegar
• 1 small shallot, finely diced
• Salt and freshly ground pepper
• 200g Waitrose Danish Smoked Bacon Lardons
• 200g Waitrose British Chicken Mini Fillets, finely sliced
• 1x50g packet Waitrose Rocket
• 3tbsp freshly grated Parmesan

Method

1. Place the potatoes in a pan of boiling water and cook for 10-15 minutes or until tender, drain and keep warm.
2. To make the dressing, mix together 4tbsp of the oil, the vinegar and shallot, season to taste and leave to one side.
3. In a large frying pan, cook the lardons until crisp and golden, drain on kitchen paper and add to the cooked potatoes and keep warm. In the same frying pan heat the remaining olive oil, add the sliced chicken and cook for 4-5 minutes until golden brown and thoroughly cooked.
4. Place the cooked chicken into a large bowl with the potato and the bacon, add the dressing and rocket, then toss gently.
5. Divide the mixture between two plates, top with the Parmesan and drizzle any remaining dressing over the salad and around the plate. Serve with warm Waitrose Rustic Bread.

 

Caesar Salad 

and more Chicken...

Ingredients

For the dressing:

• Salt and freshly ground black pepper
• 5 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
• 2 tbsp lemon juice
• 1 tsp Worcestershire sauce
• 1 clove garlic, finely chopped
• 1 tsp Dijon mustard
• 1 tbsp mayonnaise

For the croutons:

• 3 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
• 1 small white baguette, sliced
• 1 large clove garlic, crushed

For the salad:

• 2 Romaine lettuce hearts, rinsed and dried
• 100g Parmigiano-Reggiano, coarsely grated
• ½ x 100g jar of La Monegasque Anchovy Fillets with Capers and Hot Peppers in Olive Oil

Method

1. Preheat the oven to 190°C, gas mark 5. For the croutons, toss the bread in a mixture of the olive oil and crushed garlic and spread over a baking sheet. Cook for 15-20 minutes until golden and crisp. Leave to cool.
2. Tear the lettuce into bite-sized pieces and place in a salad bowl. To make the dressing, whisk the lemon juice and Worcestershire sauce with the garlic, mustard and seasoning. Whisk in the mayonnaise, then gradually whisk in the oil until the dressing is thick and creamy.
3. Add the dressing to the lettuce and toss. Add the Parmigiano-Reggiano, anchovies and croutons and toss lightly. Serve immediately.